Hey bookworms, it's been a while since I updated everyone on my indie author journey. To be honest, my life has been chaotic as fuck. I'm guessing you're in the same boat. 2020 version 3 is A Lot. There's so much going on that it's almost impossible to keep your head on straight. Slap on the daily grind—plus we're still in a pandemic—and it's very overwhelming.
Overwhelming to the point where I've had to make some pretty big decisions about what I really want in life going into my 40s (I'll be 36 in November).
See, I've spent much of my life helping people, or making things to try and help people. CONSTELIS VOSS wasn't just a sci-fi action story, it was a wish:
"If this series goes big enough, maybe we can head-off AI alignment issues early. Art can spark critical conversations, change perspectives and improve media literacy, after all."
How'd that work out? Well, the books were a success from an indie author standpoint, which is rad AF :). But sadly, my completely irrational wish to beat tech over the head with books to force the industry to stop sucking ass...didn't work.
While marketing CV, I wrote Alex's backstory: INDIGO VOSS. During that time, most of my friends were struggling. Nothing I could say or do was helping, but worst of all, my most important friend was stuck in the past.
So INDIGO VOSS happened.
Basically, IV is a guide for processing PTSD the hard way. It does double duty as catharsis and panacea; an effort to release my demons and show that I get the pain of someone I desperately love.
Despite rave reviews, the key person I wanted to read the book...hasn't. And that's when burnout toppled me. Marketing IV became impossible, as did so many other things. I hit a wall that it made me rethink my entire life.
I will market IV in the future, but first, I need to write and publish a book about one of the hardest life lessons a person can learn. A book about leaving savior behavior behind.
It's great to want to help people. To solve problems. To make art that tackles big issues and comforts folks. However, if you're like me, you're the type to set yourself on fire to keep everyone else warm. That's not healthy and it's definitely not how I want the next 40 years of my life to play out.
That's where PINK OLIVE comes in. If you haven't read the other books, Olive is a plucky autistic time-lord who has a habit of cleaning up every mess she sees. Olive is the part of me that just can't help but help, even if it hurts her.
I don't want to spoil my books, but let's just say that her backstory should be a juxtaposition between her past and saving the world from time fuckery. I decided not to do this. Instead, I'm writing PINK OLIVE in antithesis to every hero's journey; she doesn't save the world. In fact, she deliberately chooses not to, because the personal cost to her is just too damn high.
But before that happens, she learns to put herself first, spends time with her cat and boyfriend, and maybe even robs a bank or two. So far, the WIP is a totally bonkers sci-fi story with tons of queer romance and breaking the law. I hope you'll enjoy it when it's finished.
But honestly? It's fine if you don't. PINK OLIVE is for me, my husband and my cat. And I think making a bit of self-indulgent art every now and then is more than fine. In fact, it might just be pretty damn healthy, actually.
Stay tuned for snippets, updates, an ARC release and more art and stuff.
Thanks for reading :)